


Ease My Mind

by BananaProductions



Category: American Horror Story: Apocalypse, American Horror Story: Coven
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff, Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-02-29 07:32:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18774103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BananaProductions/pseuds/BananaProductions
Summary: "Going through hell and back would be worth it just to see you smile one more time"After her time in hell, Misty Day is ready to take on her worst nightmares as long as Cordelia is by her side





	1. Help me leave these lonely thoughts behind

**Author's Note:**

> Title from Ben Platt's "Ease my mind"
> 
> This is my first fic ever but I miss my babies so much, they (and we) deserve to see their love blossom.  
> English is not my first language, so sorry in advance for any mistakes.  
> Find me on Tumblr! @supremeswamp
> 
> Have a Goode Day, babes!

"I'll admit, for a moment I felt so afraid  
Just to show you the mess that I made  
There are pieces I usually hide"

 

1 week, 3 days, 11 hours.  
One week, three days and eleven hours since Misty Day came back through the doors of the academy, bringing the light back to Cordelia Goode's life.  
The supreme had dreamt of that moment, had prayed to whatever might be out there to change the swamp witch's fate, to bring her back to her, back home. 

Recovery wouldn't be easy, Cordelia knew that much, and she was ready to hold Misty's hand through it all. What she wasn't ready for, was for Misty to act like she wasn't even there.  
Nothing, nothing could have prepared her for that amount of pain, having her best friend finally back, but having her avoid her at all costs.  
One week, three days and eleven hours of restless moments, of silence. No shared smiles, no laughter, no talking, nothing.  
The supreme felt like she was losing it, all she wanted was to hold the wild blonde and never let her go. Took losing her for Cordelia to finally admit to herself the strong feelings she had towards Misty Day. 

All her life she had been told that she could never be someone's first choice, that no one would ever truly love her, not her mother, not her husband, no one. She convinced herself that she didn't deserve love, or respect. Nobody had even tried to really see her. And then, along came this angel like woman, eager to listen and learn from everything Cordelia had to offer. Not only did she give her the respect the headmistress had never gotten, but she actually believed in her. So, losing the only person who seemed to care for her, who understood her feeling of inadequacy, her loneliness, was the hardest thing she’d ever had to endure. 

 

Day after day she would hope that the swamp witch would finally talk to her like she did before. Day after day she saw Misty bonding with everybody in the house, everybody but her.  
She started doubting herself, did she imagine the connection between them? Maybe Misty just didn't care for her that much, maybe she didn't even like Cordelia… maybe, just maybe, she just needed time to readjust to life, to get back to her usual self. So she gave her some space, and though it hurt like hell, she was willing to go through any sort of pain if it meant her swamp witch would be happy.

 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 

 

Tonight was the end of her sitting on the sidelines watching everything happen, Misty could fool everyone in the house, but not Cordelia, never Cordelia. The swamp witch had done a pretty good job at hiding from the headmistress, but something in her magic was calling the older blonde, screaming for help.

She hasn't been eating.

A couple of days ago, Cordelia started to pay closer attention to Misty's behavior, there was something different, her smile and her eyes lacked that light that made the supreme feel like angry butterflies were having a party in her belly. 

While all of the girls went out for the night, Cordelia prepared herself to end this once and for all.

Two knocks. Silence.

“...Mist?” 

“Uh… come in”

The headmistress opened the door and leaned on the doorframe.

“I- um- I was wondering if we could talk a little bit”

“Yeah, sure… what's up?”

Cordelia took a moment to gather her thoughts, but the words just came out of her mouth with her voice small and broken.

“Why have you been avoiding me?” 

Silence.

Misty knew deep down that there was no use in lying, the women standing there always saw right through her.

“I- I really um… I didn't want to burden you”

Cordelia was confused. She frowned.

“Burden me? You could nev-”

“You have so much going here, so much has changed”, the swamp witch interrupted. “I didn't want you to be all worried about me a-and… I know you, Miss Cordelia. You have a heart of gold, you'd anything for any of the girls and i-” 

“You are not just one of the girls”  
Cordelia cut her off and sat next to Misty in her bed.  
She sighed, tears were clouding her vision.  
“Misty, I tried so hard to get you back. I tried everything, and I blamed myself everyday since… I'm so sorry for allowing this to happen” She was full on crying now, months of holding back her pain from everyone else and keeping it all inside for the sake of the coven was finally catching up to her in this moment.

“Hey hey, there's nothing to be sorry for, none of this was your fault, I felt you calling me, telling me to come home, but i-” 

The supreme felt strong arms circle her trembling frame, and she held onto them for dear life.  
Then a thought came to her mind. I should be the one consoling her, I should be taking care of her.

“You haven't been eating, and I feel your magic, it's exhausted,” She was afraid to ask the next question. “You- you haven't been sleeping, have you?”

She heard a broken whisper. “No”

They held each other close, feeling their hearts beat in sync.  
Cordelia didn't want to push her, they had all the time in the world.

After a few minutes, Misty broke the silence.

“I'm so scared. What if- what if I close my eyes and this was all just a mean trick? What if I never left that place, never got to see you again? I could never take it, I can't even imagine not seeing you again… I missed you so much” She took a deep breath and kept going thinking that if she were to stop, she'd never be able to tell her how she felt.  
“I knew that if I got close to you, you would of known that I wasn't ok, I didn't want to worry you. And I thought that if this was just a cruel trick, staying away from you would make it easier if they took all of this away”

“Oh, sweetheart”  
Cordelia felt the pain of a thousand lifetimes hit her like a truck.  
“Nothing and no one will EVER take you away, I won't let anything happen to you. I promise you, you are here with us, with me, and I will spend my every breathing minute making sure you are ok.  
I need you to promise me something, you will let me be here with you every step of the way. This is going to be hard, and I know it's scary, but I’ll be here and I won't go anywhere. But you have to try, you have to get some sleep, baby”  
The term of endearment rolled out of her tongue before she could even realize it. But she did not regret it.

Another whisper, “I'm scared”. 

The supreme pulled back from their embrace and caressed the younger blonde's tear stained cheeks.  
“I know, but I'll stay right here, I will hold you all night and every night if you need me to”

A barely there nod was all it took.

Cordelia laid down and took Misty in her arms. The swamp witch nuzzled her face in her neck.  
Being there, in each other's embrace, made everything seem possible.

This was gonna be hard, for sure, but this was just the beginning… their new beginning.


	2. Don't crush me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from Avril Lavigne's song: Crush

“And honey don't hide

That look in your eyes

Darlin’ it, it drives me crazy”

 

The night was quiet, but Cordelia couldn't sleep, and she was sure that as long as Misty was in her arms she would never sleep again. Watching the swamp witch breathe slowly, her unruly hair spread across her chest, hand resting above her heart, she knew she never wanted to leave this moment. 

At some point she heard the girls coming back, she looked at the clock on the nightstand and saw it was past their curfew, she told herself that she would deal with that in the morning, but right now something more important was taking place, she felt Misty moving, mumbling, and suddenly start crying.

She was having a nightmare. 

Cordelia began caressing her hair. “Misty, baby, wake up”

She shook her slightly. “Wake up, sweetheart, it's just a bad dream”

Misty started to move, and tried to push away the arms that were holding her, scared of whom they might belong to, her eyes shot open, and when she saw Cordelia, she started sobbing.

“Hey hey hey, you’re safe, you’re here with me” 

Cordelia hugged her and tried to bring her back to reality. Her heart broke a little watching her beloved Cajun suffering.  
It took a while for Misty to calm down, and when she did, all she could say was “I'm sorry”.

“You have nothing to apologise for, darling, I'm just glad you are ok” 

So once again, they laid back on the bed, facing each other. Cordelia kept her eyes set on Misty's for what seemed like an eternity.  
Misty started smiling and looking at her.

“What?” Asked the older blonde giggling.

“Nothing… it's just,” her mind was racing, she felt a warm feeling in her chest. “The way you look at me, with those eyes of yours -I didn't got to tell you that earlier, but they are so pretty-, I- i don't know, you just make me feel like I… matter to you and you care, like I'm important or something, and I never felt that before”

Hearing those words coming out of the mouth of the angel, that happened to be laying right next to her, made Cordelia soar, blush, and break a little.  
How could this perfect woman feel like she didn't matter? How did anybody passed on a chance to love her and make her feel as special as she is?  
Then and there she decided that she would.

“You do matter to me, I've never cared about anyone the way I care about you, and it hurts me to know that it took losing you to realize how much I love you” 

Granted, the lack of sleep might have had something to do with this confession, there was no way in hell she would've left herself say such a thing right now, with Misty being so vulnerable.  
As her mind was telling her that she made a huge mistake, she missed the swamp witch leaning in.

A soft kiss was placed on her lips. She froze.

Now it was Misty's turn to feel anxiety: she was just being your friend, and you ruined it.

“Oh my God, I don't know why I did th-”

This was her new favorite way of being told to shut up. Cordelia's lips felt so soft, and she melted into them. The kiss was slow, and it felt like they might die if they were to pull away.  
When her stupid body couldn't keep going without oxygen, Misty reluctantly pulled away. She rested her forehead against Cordelia's.

The Cajun broke the silence.  
“Do I take that as in 'I meant what I said’ or as in ‘I just wanted you to shut up’?” 

“Mmmh, I think the latter” she answered giggling.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah” 

The supreme smiled and kissed her again.

 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

The sun started peaking out through the window, Misty's eyes fluttered open.  
In her arms laid the most beautiful thing her eyes had ever seen. A smile settled on her lips as she took an uncharacteristically messy strand of Cordelia's hair out of her face to get a better look.  
The headmistress gave her a sleepy smile.

“Good morning, beautiful. Did you sleep ok?” Misty asked as she hugged Cordelia with all her might. 

The older blonde nodded. “How could I not when I have an angel holding me?” She smiled and giggled. 

Misty laughed, “When did you become so cheesy?” 

“Shut up” The headmistress leaned in and kissed her softly.

They pulled away just barely, and murmured against each other's lips.  
“If you keep trying to make me shut up this way, I'm might never stop talking” 

“Fine by me”

They kissed again.

It felt surreal, being there, both alive and well, kissing like there is no tomorrow. They had waited for this their whole lives, they just didn't know it.  
All the pain and heartbreak, it was damn worth it, cause it led them to this, to each other.

There was a lot to deal with still, what they were, Misty's recovery, their fears and insecurities, but unlike before, they had time. Time to learn everything about one another, the good and the bad, their childhoods, every little thing that makes them who they are.  
The prospect of that made this moment even more perfect.  
Everything bad in life remained outside that white door, and for the time being, they were fine with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finals week is making me hate my writing even more than I already do, but somehow this two still make me happy so, this may suck, sorry lol


End file.
